How do you smoke tea

Translation of "why do you smoke" in English

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If this makes you sick why do you smoke?
If you're such a gourmet why do you smoke then that?
And why do you smoke such a dirty old pipe?
Why do you smoke Not that tea, you climb into that freezer and pull off a hundred percent spooner.
Why do you smoke not a cigarette while you wait?
Why do you smoke not just none?
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