How closed are you

Always the other.

The others are to blame.

After all, they hurt me once.

You made me who I am.

Now I shut myself up all my life, hold grudges against all of humanity, and never open up to anyone again.

In the future, I will show all those who will come into my life from the outset that they are undesirable in my presence. And let them feel my disappointment and dislike.

People suck.

Nobody understands me, nobody loves me and sees me as I really am.

Nobody sees my true being.

Yes, but how then, if you never open yourself, but walk through life closed?

We humans are not telepaths and mind readers.

These questions are much more crucial in life.

  • How would you like to be treated yourself?
  • Do you even want to be understood?
  • And what do you do to ensure that others can understand you?
    Do you even give them a chance?

Do not complain about closed, grim, embittered, unfriendly people in the world when you yourself run closed and grim and bitter through life and radiate this.

How do you understand people best? But through experiences and conversations with them, in which they approach you openly and honestly and you also give them the chance to get to know you a little better.

In particular, you learn to understand people by better reflecting, understanding and getting to know yourself.

You're closed because someone hurt you once. Of course, but everyone else has been injured as well.

It doesn't do you any good to keep saying, "Others were once mean to me, now I'm the same with others from the start„.

No, the world no longer needs closed people. And in this context, by no means, of course - introverted - people are meant, but those who nestle in their victim role of experiences, complain and only look to others to blame for everything instead of changing themselves.

Closed people full of resentment and fear, create even more closed people full of resentment and fear?

"Life and society made me what I am now".

That is generally not wrong, because our environment shapes us strongly. But constantly persuading yourself that you have no control over yourself and your life, that you are only a victim to whom everything happens and not a self-determined being that can constantly change, harbors nothing but resignation and distance to yourself and life itself.

You give up responsibility for yourself and transfer everything to others and to life.

You look at yourself and the world negatively and see yourself helplessly at the mercy of everything. Everything just happens to you and you forget that you yourself are the creator of your future.

At some point you only see other people as perpetrators. And tends to subconsciously prejudice them. So you see yourself confirmed in your role and your worldview when you are looked at or treated unkindly again.

Yes, in such a role you don't exactly radiate friendliness towards others.You quickly become one of those people about whom you are always upset.

The resentment within us only attracts more resentment in life.

Of course, our environment influences us in life, but we have the greatest power over how we think, act, react and live. We have absolute power over ourselves every second. We become the plaything of our environment mainly through unconsciousness and by relinquishing responsibility for ourselves.

As children, we are all open-hearted and curious, we trust and quickly embrace others. And then, KABoooooooom, we get pounded in front of the bow by one of our fellows. Except that pulls, that hurt. Then there is the trust in people, everyone experiences it more or less, everyone has this experience.

From this we learn to close ourselves off. As a child, this is a protective measure. We don't want this bad pain again. We nibble on it and later it is fear of this fear that blocks us.

People, especially children and young people, can be monsters. And we can and could be some too. We must have injured others too.

Many more injuries often only happen because one slips into a light or a stronger victim role due to his closeness and the fear of injury that one radiates. Or through love.

Yes, life is nasty now and then, but it is even more so when we close ourselves off.

People are shit too sometimes, but the majority of those you meet and who you have met, whether in childhood or youth, did nothing to you and will do nothing to you. There were few individuals.

And many people must have given you joy too.

People have been nice to you and everyone else deserves a chance.

Would you like to live without her, be the only one of your kind, be all alone on this planet. No suffering, no joy, no story, no moments in good and bad times to share and experience with you?

All people want to be understood and respected. Everyone secretly wants more openness.

It is not fair to continue to punish others, yourself and your life for the past and the unprocessed fear and to shut yourself off strongly.

People would appreciate openness and openness towards them.

We often feel more comfortable around open people. They also give us a feeling of not being so wrong and inhuman. You can be more free around you and you don't have to constantly watch what you are saying. You don't have to be careful about suppressing things and you can take off your masks and protective posture. And maybe tell something about yourself and reveal something.

A human exchange far from superficiality is quickly possible with open people.

Open people have also been hurt at times, but they no longer have a great threatening fear of it, because they appreciate themselves enough, have processed their basic wounds and / or have been left so and have learned that no words could hurt them again dearart deeply.

Contrary to what most people suspect, openness does not offer any more attack surface than closeness. Open people are more respected because they radiate what each of us is, namely humanity. The open-hearted person stands by himself, his mistakes and experiences.

Closed people radiate a victim role rather than open-hearted people.

Of course, as children we are open-hearted people and then get hurt. But at this stage everything is to be assessed differently than it is now.

We have to work for openness again. Look at our fears, deal with them, accept ourselves with our wounds and learn to love more. This is not a cup that is won once and can then be kept, it is awareness anew every day.

We have to understand that nothing can ever hurt us as much as it did as a child or as a teenager.

Open or open-hearted adult people are much less vulnerable than closed people.

Why go through life locked up when there is so much more to be open-hearted?

Try openness, try it out. Tell others what's on your mind, what's on your mind, when you feel like it.
Tell when you are satisfied or angry about something or about your life and traits if you like. It makes you feel much more free. And you will be amazed what others suddenly reveal themselves and what you can learn and take away from others and their stories and thoughts.

Everyone is a teacher, you can take something away from everyone.

In a more open society, more of us could stand by ourselves to be human. Let's start creating you.

We Germans are generally considered closed, inaccessible, sometimes unfriendly and cold. The majority of Germans are anything but cold and unfriendly. Many wonderful and warm people live in this country. Only this closeness and skepticism makes some of them appear cold and unfriendly at times.
The German in general prefers to wait until the other person opens up first so that he can talk about himself.

Are we particularly afraid of being prejudiced here in Germany?

However, you can clearly see that my generation is becoming more and more open. The men of my generation are also no longer so closed and you can often chat with them about problems, mistakes, makings and feelings as well as joys and hopes.

We have nothing more to lose through openness, nobody has that except the children. They initially lose their openness by being open and being hurt. But we don't, we adults can't lose when we've got them back and are working to keep them.

You can't be open-hearted every day, but a general upward trend would be good for everyone.

It is not the fault of the others that we often stand in our own way or close ourselves off.

We can always start to change this and our point of view.

We have a lot to gain in life if we learn to be more open again.

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1 comment

  1. German on February 14, 2018 at 9:39 am